well, just last night she told me that she was actually 4 realll stayin' in new york and i feel like crap last night i couldn't sleep cus i was cryinggg for like i don't kno how longgg it seemedd like 4 ever and i wanted to liike throw up and shittt and i didn't want to move and at first i was okk but then it hitt me liike a rockk, she wasn't here and going..she was already there and wasn't comingg back for a while and that seems liike a long time and even though she is probably coming home nxt yearr.. i don'tt thinkk she is b/c i kno her mom and nxt year she will say ur stayingg up there and by that time she won't want to come backk! and i feel like if something else happens i will not break but shatter in to a million tinyy pieces and i feel so freakin' empty b/c it is not like i have a boyfriend to talk to or hang out with all i have are some of my other friends and that doesn't seem like enough to heal me i need a doctor like a love doctor or something to fill a peice of my heart> and she said i would always be her best friend 4 ever but i kno she will have a new best friend and i am okk with that b/c i probably will too but she will always be my bestest friend! but i need to think and shittt for awhile and i need something new to think about like vaughn but yea i don't want to worry about him right now! someone help me get this off my mind!i'm going to my dads call me! 2530373 heall myy heartt! LoVeE mEe!!