... i feel like shit.. i feel like im going to break down and cry my head off.. lol i don't know why.. when im around my parents and "friends" i try and act all happy and everything so that no body would know that i am depressed.. i dont want people to worry bout me.. but i dont think i kan fake it any more.. omg! i kan't stand it.. i hate this.. i wish everything would go back to normal! i hate it here! today would have been my last day of school if i were still in NJ... but nope.. i had to come here.. and got out of school June 3.. i still kinda wish school was still in so that i could actually meet somebody that lives in my neighborhood.. b.c. i think if i knew somebody and hung out with them i wouldnt be so lonely and depressed.. i think this boredum is going to kill me.. i have NOTHING to do.. so i just eat and lay around.. i am soon going to become fat like a hippo.. maybe i'll go running in the mornings.. and maybe i'll meet somebody that way.. lol... i think i am going to try and go tomorrow morning.. and i'll bring my dog so i don't look like a complete retard.. i wish i had someone to go running with because then maybe i wouldnt feel so stupid.. i dont like being alone.. like without anyone i know.. Jenn was like my sister.. we did like everything together..well... not eveything.. but liike a lot of things.. you get the picture.. lol and now since i moved i think we are getting further apart.. and i don't want to lose her friendship.. oh god.. here comes the tears.. lol.. she was like a long lost sister to me.. and now.. i dunno.. i think i am just scared one day everybody will stop talking to me from up there.. and i dont want them to.. well.. its like 10:30 and i have like nothing else to write.. so bye for nowz.....