Listening to: Gwen Stefani - Hollaback Girl
Feeling: awful
no no no no why did i just do that.
a hot chocolate with marshmallows n chocolate sauce that i stupid i knew it was even as i was making it but i didn't stop no i didn't stop. because im weak very weak. my day was ruined i had some bread and butter i shouldn't have done that. i should have thrown it away. i could have i could have got away with it but no. no no no no no im too weak and fat and disgusting i ate it and ate the chocolate.
i promiced myself i wouldn't have anything bad, half a dinner meal at the most urgh. i should have just waited till tommorow. stupid mind. stupid me. im disgusting. so wrong. so so wrong. i need to be thin. why can't i just be thin?
weighed myself and i've put on 2 pounds so what do i do? go home and have chocolate! gross! :'(
you can talk to me if you need,
im pretty sure i know what your dealing with
i've been there, done that.
dont hurt yourself dear
better days will come x3 x3 x3
love
its fine. its kwl 2 hav sum1 new 2 talk 2. especially bout self harm, ive only ever bin able 2 talk 2 her about it n iv always bin scared im gonna upset her or something.
she does tell me she is sorry and that she loves me. and i do try to believe it.
xHUGx
hey, thanx 4 the comment :D
well kelli is based on my best friend. everything ive said about kelli's life is tru about hers. she hasnt commited suicide, but she has attempted it, and its a story about how i would feel if she did, something wich ive thought about alot.
x
Xxthanx :)
yeah i wil rite mor soon. i think the next chapter wil probably be a flashback, summat that rly did happen 2 me n my friend.
hmmmm.
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Xx