this is the hardest thing i've ever done without telling anyone and i did it all on no sleep no counting sheep straight up all night i learned, alright. he taught me things i already knew he said them till my brain was blue suffocated and thoughts couldn't get through so many words with nothing to do a bright lit computer screen instead of inviting just looks mean and void of anything close to real anything that could make me feel make me bleed then make me heal. the sun's coming up up, over, and out it seems like there's a story that it should be about but i think to not think or sit back and not drink just try to not blink focus on the bright light stare while your mind and eyes fight i really should turn away but i need to watch the start of today to discern wrong from right to truly watch a bird's flight this is when it all get's figured out. this is when i decide what about and this meaningless sunrise that's blinding to my eyes and all the words and all the stories all the birds and falls from glory all the grass atop the mud broken glass that's caked in blood i run through my mind till it stops making sense and the little runner finds the inevitable fence that barricades her in the pasture for sometime from now and could last until after "after what?" a question said. replied the answer, "escaping her head"